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“It’s easy for me to appear terribly knowledgeable when I roll my eyes and say: 'No, no, you fool, it was 12th-century Venice!

’ But the truth is, I’ve got it written down in front of me.” I fear the lady doth protest too much, having bagged the now bearded David Mitchell – “I love the beard.

And not just because, in its controversial Society Breasts issue, Tatler gave her the Bluestocking Tits award.

Precociously bright, she was penning a weekly teen column in this very newspaper at the age of 15, then went on to read English at Oxford, where she got a First.

She now writes a column for GQ magazine and a Sunday newspaper, but is better known for her television work.

Glamorous, blonde, curvaceous in all the right places and sharply funny on-screen, off-air she has a warmth entirely at odds with her deadpan Have I Got News For You delivery.

On the other hand, a Spin-Off can fail entirely if the star is a Satellite Character whose character can't support their own stories.

This is a common way to make a Battle Butler more interesting.

Without this interaction, they would otherwise be pretty bland.So impassive were her features, I always thought she’d had Botox. But I have really thought about experimenting by having shedloads – I mean not just a bit here or there, completely paralysing my face so only my eyeballs move – before a big poker tournament to see how that would psych out everyone else,” she says, beaming.It might be just the ticket for the forthcoming European Poker Tour (EPT) taking place in London early next month, at which Coren – who was the first woman to win an EPT event in 2006 for £500,000 prize money – will be playing. “I mean, he’s a hugely successful television comedian, he could have had a gorgeous 24-year-old skinny wife with a tiny nose and a string bikini, but he chose me! ” Coren, or Coren Mitchell as she haphazardly calls herself when she thinks it won’t cause too much confusion, is so disarmingly, so extravagantly in love with her husband of 10 months, I (almost) forgive her. Despite being happily married to a diffident clever-clogs of my own, even I secretly hoped I might be in with a chance, were Mitchell and I to stumble across one another by the seminal 1911 edition of the Encyclopaedia Britannica at the British Library.




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